An average person, have between 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts per day which is an statement describing that we live much more in our heads than anywhere else...
Do you think our thoughts are who we are? Or do you think who we are is in charge of the thoughts?...
Whatever your answer is, that’s your reality; because no one sees what you see, even if they see it too...
I believe who we are is beyond mind, body or emotions; yet they are instruments for our soul to learn from this adventure called life, however my intention today isn’t talking about enlightenment, but to point out that our quality of life depends in large scale of the quality of our thoughts.
The world teach us how to “survive” outside, but it doesn’t teach us how to survive inside...
Our internal world, our internal dialogues, our mental habits and what we choose to believe, are in grand percentage the compass of our success as human beings. Im not talking about financial success, Im talking about the capacity of enjoying life how is meant to be.
My proposal, OBSERVE!
Meditation is pretty much about observation, but not everyone is willing to seat for an hour and observe breathing patterns, yet anyone can make a habit and practice observation on daily basics.
Let’s make a habit of observation; without judging, just stopping for a second and observe what’s around, how we feel, what we are eating and enjoy every bite, how the sun touches our skin, how good a hug feels and specially observe our thinking patterns; because the first step to brake a pattern is to actually realize that there is a pattern.
Observation is the key to becoming the masters of our thoughts rather than the slaves of them.
If we discovered that there is a pattern of self abusing thoughts, we can be able to transform that pattern from a train of judgment to a compassionate and motivational new believe, it only takes practice. We can train our mind as much as we can train our body.
Observation is the first and most important practice, because it connect us with life and the present moment, allows us to choose and invite us to enjoy the gifts of God.
Reprogramming our Thoughts
Recognizing and letting go of toxic relationships are part of your self care.
It is important to realize if you are the common denominator in those relationships. If you have always seen yourself involved in conflict and toxicity, then you need to ask yourself if you are actually the toxic person or if you are the one that needs the most healing, before keep pointing out others for being the reflection of your own pain or poison.
In case that you’re aware of your baggage and you have been actively working on your growth; if you are on top of your emotional, mental and spiritual health; if you are, for the most part, peaceful, open to healthy communication, accountable for your flaws and shadows, forgiving, positive and the majority of your relationships are healthy; then letting go of people that are always trying to bring you down, is part of your self care.
Some relationships are really hard to let go because they are supposed to be your closest people. Parents, siblings, “best” friends, spouses, in laws, bosses, among others. However, if you have seen yourself trying everything to make it work, always walking on eggshells around them, feeling down most times you interact with them, feeling crazy after they twisted or manipulate information; then it’s time to do something about it to honor your mental and emotional health.
Cutting and letting go those kind of relationships, looking forward without trying to understand why it didn’t work and actively doing your part of healing the damage that they caused, would be the best solution.
Yet, in case of particular circumstances that aren’t letting you completely cut those relationships, healthy boundaries are the answer, but that’s another post to talk about...
All our thoughts, believes and ideas are based on our story, environment and own perception. We may not be able to control or change some life circumstances, but our perception is ultimately our choice, which means it can be changed.
We have the power to train our mind as much as we train our body! What if we decide to choose better thoughts? What if we use our will to build a life from the proper mindset?!
We are the artists of our own story. There are always going to be external circumstances that we can’t control, but how we see it and how we take care of them is mostly up to us.
We have the power to choose our attitude, we have the power to focus on the solution instead of the problem, we have the power to educate our minds to see the positive.
In order to do that, we need to be vigilants of our thoughts, habits, choices and relationships. It is our responsibility to be the person we are meant to be...
I am starting a “DITCH THE DATING APP” campaign...
Girls please!!!! How do you want to become a priority if you are already exposing yourself as an option? How do you want to be a “forever” if you are already starting as a “for now”.
Why do you have to prove your value and “compete” with a sea of pictures trying to do the same??!!!
At what point in time, did love become a scrolling business?!... Where are the flowers, the candles, the songs in the middle of the night, the art of persuasion, the romance?!!
DITCH THE DATING APP!!!!!... Learn how to be happy alone; spend time in your hobbies; work in your mental, emotional and physical growth; get in the habit of self care...
If we love ourselves, we don’t need to “look for love”. If we love ourselves, WE ATTRACT LOVE.
The Mindset Artistry
Another YouTuber asked me the other day how I handle the haters and it took me a minute to answer that question because I realized I don't "handle" them ...
You see, haters don't really hate you, haters are admirers in disguise who hate themselves for liking you, so there's no reason to bother, and besides, other people's words and actions are simply a reflection of who they are, not who you are.
Lovers have no time for hatred, lovers are too busy loving, building, and supporting. Lovers know their value, so they don't need to belittle anyone to feel great.
I remember a couple of years ago, I used to go every Sunday to my favorite zumba class in Lifetime with Rosie Herrera and there was a girl that I admired because she was a great dancer and knew all the choreographies, so I always tried to be at her side because I could follow her when I didn't know the next steps. She was so good that Rosieta (the instructor) called her on stage and posted videos dancing with her to promote her class.
I was new to social media and decided to share some dance videos, so I went to the Lifetime General Manager and asked him for permission to shoot videos in class. Not only did he approved it, but he encouraged me to do it because, as an employee and Personal Trainer, it was great for promotion and we had a policy that allowed employees to film classes.
The following Sunday, I got to class early so I could get a front-row and she was there, besides me as usual. I put my phone in front of me and started dancing and filming one of my favorite songs. She stopped in the middle of the song, went to my phone looking angry and threw my phone away. I was shocked for a second, but then I picked up my phone and put it a little bit further so she wasn't on it, but then she left the class and went to the General Manager to complain. After realizing that he was supporting me, she went to the Instructor’s Manager, gathered signatures with all the regular dancers with a request to ban me from the class and this went on and on for a month...lol
Anyway, I confessed that I felt between flattered and sorry, because I couldn't understand why I deserved that much of attention or why someone would spend that much time and effort on trying to bring me down. My solution was writing a decent but firm letter that I shared with the class, apologizing for the inconvenience yet explaining why I had the right to publish my dance videos and clarifying that I wasn’t stopping and my manager had to put a sign at the door with the policy that supported me...
The point is, haters don’t hate us, haters hate themselves and instead of hate back, what they need is healing, but that’s their responsibility...